WHAT MOST MAKES YOU YOU?

By Edwin Cooney

At the close of my first column dated Wednesday, June 15th, 2005, I closed by relating part of a conversation between reporter Arnold Michaelis and two-time Democratic Party presidential nominee Adlai Stevenson. Near the close of their conversation, Michaelis made the following observation to Governor Stevenson: "You may not be what you think you are, but what you think, YOU ARE.” The Governor responded to that observation by his more or less concurrence.

On a lighter note, back in November of 1969 as I was turning 24, I was riding in a car with a couple I’ll call Michael and Pamela when the following set of questions took place:

“What do you think, Ed?”

Then came "What?? Do you think, Ed?”

Next it was something like "Whaddaya think, Ed?”

"Try not to think, Ed!”

What I didn't realize was that Michael and Pamela were recording the whole thing on cassette which they presented to me for Christmas. I still have the tape and despite the rather rough ribbing tone of the above questions, I treasure that cassette!

More seriously, there is an ad on Audacy Radio where a woman relates how at one time in her life she was homeless and stole dresses from local department stores. Eventually, she realized that if she didn't change her life she would end up in jail or dead. Then she quotes a thought she attributes to Buddha: Happiness doesn't depend on what you possess or even who you are! Happiness depends on what you think! (Note that some may say that it depends on how you think!)

Of course, when we're young our thoughts are largely dependent on the emotional, spiritual, and overall environment of our family. However, as time goes on and we're buffeted by both the challenges of our achievements and failures, we experience an increasing need to re-evaluate everything from our own temperament to the temperament of family, friends, supporters, competitors and the world in general.

When  I was growing up, I developed an interest in, and a fierce patriotic loyalty to, our country which I defined as love. Back then, I believed that the only way to show how much I loved America was to endorse every aspect of our history from our "Manifest Destiny” first enunciated in 1845 by New York City publisher John O'Sullivan to the idea of "America! Right or wrong” as put forth by many conservative commentators during the controversial Vietnam War of the 1960s. The turmoil of that conflict along with the professional, personal and spiritual experiences I've had since then, has literally altered my concept of loving any person, any experience, or even my country.

Love of country is no longer fierce loyalty or partisanship. I’ve come to believe that you and I, when it comes to our children or even our nation, have an obligation to put our thoughts and feelings about their actions into perspective. Nations supposedly function on legal documents or constitutions but they’re governed by fallible people who can be very naughty at times. 

Perhaps the most challenging question we are forced to ask ourselves is: What do I think of my thinking process? Does it challenge past conclusions or merely confirm them? Do I grow via my own thinking or am I mostly reinforced and comforted by it? How much of my thinking is original and how much of it depends on doctrine?

As my thinking relates to others, do I consider most people to be well-intended or do I believe that they are mostly vain and selfish? Do I naturally like others or am I suspicious of their motives? Am I interested in others or do I care how people see me?

Finally, "shucking right down to the cob,” as the late Paul Harvey liked to put it, what do I think about the way I think? As old as I am, shouldn’t I continue to be open to new or revised thinking, even about myself?

As confusing and as frustratingly inconclusive as thinking can too often be, I'm grateful to Michael and Pamela’s set of inquiries back on Saturday, November 29th of nearly 53 years ago. I think this light-hearted ribbing has made me “me” — and has largely equipped me to write these weekly musings!

The bottom line question was: “What! Do you think, Ed?"

RESPECTFULLY SUBMITTED,

EDWIN COONEY